Bubbe's Place: Stories

Rov Nachman's Butterfly Stone

Mama, Papa and I counted the different engravings that adorned the tombstones in the Koshovoto Landsman Cemetery. By our count there were:

1. Stars of David

2. Candelabras

3. Hands in priestly blessings (Used on graves of Cohanim)

3. Levite cups (Used on graves of Levites)

4. Crowns of Torah (Used on scholar's graves)

5. Two tablets (Ten Commandments)

6. Book of Life

7. Candle (Light of the soul)

8. And on Old Russian stones, photos of the deceased

I was surprised when I came to Rov Nachman's grave and saw butterflies engraved on the stone. I questioned my parents. "Is this a Jewish symbol? Is this appropriate on a Jewish stone?"

Papa assured me that it was unusual to see butterflies on a stone in America, but that it was a traditional symbol. Butterfly wings were supposed to represent the rising soul. In old midrashim (Stories) butterfly wings were the wings of angels. In the old, old days folk believed that the butterflies were the sign of immortality.

"O.K. now I am really curious. I must hear Rov Nachman's story."

Mama and Papa asked me again if I really wanted to hear this very sad story.

Mama began, "So much promise…wasted."

Papa said, "…A clash of generations. A time of change…"

Now I was really hooked. I pointed to a near by bench and said, "Sit and tell me it all." They took turns telling me the following story.

Rov Nachman was educated in Vilna, the Jerusalem of Eastern Europe. He came from a long line of Rabbis and Talmudic scholars. In his late twenties he felt that he had a calling. He believed that he had been chosen, selected, to go out and spread the wisdom of Torah to Jews who lived far from Vilna. When he arrived in Koshovoto, he wed a local girl and settled down to raise a family and to teach the wisdom of Torah. Now he dreamed that his small school would grow to be a Yeshiva, a Jewish center of learning that might someday rival Vilna.

Rov Nachman and his wife Freidel had six daughters. Finally Freidel gave birth to a healthy baby boy, a kaddishel. (A son who would say the mourner's prayers for his parents.) They named their sweet son, Zalman.

Even before Zalman started school, Rov Nachman realized that his son was a proper scion, descendent, of all those Rabbis and Tsadikim (Pious men). Soon it was apparent to the learned men of Koshovoto that Zalman had an exceptional mind, that he was a child Prodigy. He was the inheritor of the yichus (Lineage) that produced outstanding talmudic scholars. Zalman read even before he learned his aleph bet. (Hebrew alphabet) Zalman was blessed with a mind that only needed to see something once to remember it forever. Once he saw a page of Torah or Talmud he could repeat it flawlessly.

Rov Nachman understood his son's gifts and carefully he cherished them. He studied with Zalman and he told Zalman his plans. When Zalman was thirteen he would bring Zalman to Vilna. There, Zalman would study in a Yeshiva with the very best scholars in the Jewish world. When Zalman was eleven, Rov Nachman wrote to the Rosh Yeshiva (Head of the school) and told the Rosh about Zalman's yichus, (lineage) and his talents, and his accomplishments.

Rov Nachman's plans came to a screeching halt the morning that Zalman announced quietly, "I don't want to go west to the Yeshiva. I want to go north to the University!" Rov Nachman could not believe his ears. Er haut ge clopt der oyer mitt de hant, (He banged his ears with his hand.) but it didn't change the message. Rov Nachman shouted, "University! Where did you hear about a University?"

Zalman answered, The Pan (Polish lord who owned the huge estate surrounding Koshovoto.) The Pan told me about the University. Papa you have no idea how big the world is. You can't imagine all the things they teach you in the University…art, music, geography, science."

Rov Nachman screamed, "Jews don't need to study those things! Jews need to study Torah! Oh yes I have heard about universities. They won't take a Jewish boy in their classes. When? Where? Did the Pan hear about you a Jewish boy?"

Zalman replied quietly, "The Pan heard from the priest. The priest heard from the townspeople about me. The townspeople heard stories on the market days from the Jews. The townspeople were afraid that I had a magical, a wizardly mind. They told the priest that they thought that I was a sorcerer. I didn't want to worry you about those silly stories. So I kept quiet and didn't tell you that the village people called me 'der tayl'. (The devil) Finally the priest and the Pan and the pawlitshaey (Police) took me to the church and spoke with me."

Rov Nachman was frightened and subdued, but he had to know. "Did they touch you?"

"No Papa."

"Did they make signs over you? Did they sprinkle water on you?"

"No Papa. They just asked me questions. They showed me a Hebrew page and were surprised that I could recite it perfectly after only a few minutes of study. And Papa they were so silly. They asked me to change a stone into an egg. They wanted me to do miracles. Only God can perform miracles. At first they were angry when I couldn't do what they asked. But after a while they stopped their foolishness and were smiling and friendly."

"Zalman, did they ever meet with you again?"

"Yes Papa. At the next meeting they had three other men that they called professors. Papa, why did you say that the University wouldn't take a Jewish boy? The professors invited me to come to the University. And Papa you don't have to worry about money. The Pan said that he will pay all the money."

Rov Nachman calmed himself and tried to reason with Zalman. "It would be a big mistake to go to the University. You'll forget our ways. How will you keep kosher? Where will you find a minyan (Prayer group of ten men) to pray with? You'll be corrupted. You'll forget our ways. You'll become an apikorous! (A nonbeliever). You'll end up a communist or worse yet a Zionist!"

Here I interrupted. "Why did Rov Nachman believe a Zionist was worse than a Communist. Communists didn't believe in God."

Mama explained, "A communist wanted to bring down the tsarist government. Jews had no love for the tsars and thought the communists couldn't be worse than the tsars. But Zionists…they were feared by the ultra orthodox Jews. The Zionists wanted to reestablish the State of Israel. Those misguided young people wouldn't wait for meshiach! (The messiah). They would ruin everything!"

Now back to our story about Rov Nachman and his son Zalman.

Nothing Rov Nachman said could deter Zalman. Zalman would and did go to the University. Encouraged and supported by the Pan, Zalman went north to the University to study. When he returned to visit his family, he came back more corrupted than Rov Nachman's worst nightmare. He came back an apikorous! He came back an artist, a sculptor!

In disbelief Rov Nachman quoted to Zalman from Exodus 20:4 "You shall not make a graven image, or any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth."

"How could you, my son, turn away from your people and become a creator of idols? My son would not make idols. You cannot be my Zalman. My son is dead." Rov Nachman and his household tore their clothing, put ashes on their heads and sat Shiva (The traditional mourning period) for Zalman.

No one left Rov Nachman and Freidel to mourn their son in peace. The neighbors, their friends, even their relatives, and the Yeshiva in Vilna too, all pecked at them. Everyone pretended that they did not know what happened. All were searching for a tidbit to gossip about.

"Zalman died so suddenly. Was it der rak (Cancer) that killed Zalman?"

"Oh my! I didn't know he was sick. He was such a healthy child."

"Too much study is bad for the brain. It can drive a mentch meshugeh. (Person crazy)."

The Rosh Yeshiva wrote, "Where is the young scholar, der chochem (The wise one)? When will your gerlernter (Scholar) arrive here in Vilna?"

"Zei dergeyn mir di yorn," (They pester me) cried Rov Nachman bitterly. "My son is dead and they want details. They want to know more. There is nothing more to tell. They hang on me like leaches. Blut (Blood) kvetchers (Squeezers) …Genug shoin! (Enough already)."

"Come Freidel. We will take our daughters and go far away where no one knows us. We will go where no one knows that we once had a son."

And so they packed their belongings and traveled to America. In America they hid in the crowded streets and apartments on the East side of New York, America. In America he was no longer Rov Nachman the teacher and scholar. In America he became Mr. Nachman the sad little man who spoke very little. When the neighbors asked him where he emigrated from, he was purposely vague. He could have been a teacher in America, but he refused to teach. Maybe, just maybe, it was his fault that Zalman became an apikorous. Maybe he pushed too hard. He was afraid to teach. Maybe he might destroy another bright student. Instead of teaching he did nothing.

In America his daughters went to school. They worked in the needle trades during the day and went to school at night. Mr. Nachman didn't care what they did. They had to work to support themselves and their old parents. The six girls became bookkeepers and teachers. Mr. Nachman didn't notice. His son was dead and all his dreams were dead too.

What happens to a man whose dreams have died? He shrivels up inside and fades away. He dies. The girls buried him in the Brooklyn Koshovoto Cemetery. They heeded his instructions. They didn't erect a stone. "Oys machen zien numen un mein numen vi lang mein Zalman blaybt a apikorous." Erase his name and my name as long as Zalman remains a nonbeliever.

His parents were so klein shtetldic (Provincials,such hicks). Imagine! They disowned him because of their small minds, their old fashioned customs! He didn't reject them because of their opinions. They…They declared him dead! Why? Just because he was a modern man. Well so be it. He was a twentieth century person and he didn't reject them just because they were superstitious and behind the times. He was a twentieth century man and he had chosen a different path. He had a talent for art and he would develop it. "O.K. Koshovoto… you won't see me again!" he vowed.

In Russia making a living as a sculptor was hard. People were preoccupied with politics. There really was no reason for Zalman to stay in a land where he had no family. Zalman decided to move to a land that appreciated artists and sculptors. France? No he would travel to sunny Italy. He returned to the University to study the Italian language and to prepare himself for life in Italy.

He knew that no Jewish community would welcome a sculptor. He decided to move to the artist quarter. He would hide his background and would pretend to be a lapsed Greek Orthodox man. If anyone questioned his accent or his mannerisms, he would claim that they were Ukrainian traits.

The artist colony accepted him cordially. He felt free without the old restrictions that covered food, dress, behavior, and thought. In his mind everything old, everything from the past, was terrible. He saw only good in his new life. He made many new friends. He fell in love and he was married in her church. As he watched his bride approaching him in the nave of the church, he chanted silently, "The statues, the stain glass windows, the paintings are all just objects of art. There is only one God. God is One."

On the surface the marriage was good. But Zalman was not content. He didn't like her cooking or her menus. He hated the smell of treif in their kitchen. She didn't keep her person as his women folk had kept theirs. He was always comparing and she was always scoring below the mark. His critical looks and comments took a toll on her. She changed from a carefree girl to a woman on edge. She became pregnant. She had problems and lost the baby. She became depressed. He became morose.

At first her parents assured her that the next pregnancy would be better. When she didn't conceive, her parents turned on Zalman, the silent one. "What is he hiding? Who were his parents? Why doesn't he ever get a visitor or a letter?" His wife's depression deepened and she became drained. In the end she faded away.

Zalman was alone. His wife's family blamed him for their daughter's depression and demise. His artist friends avoided the angry, depressed Zalman. Zalman raged against the God of Israel, whom he blamed for all his woes and disappointments. He argued with God. "Lord I have not forgotten your warning to the children of Israel before they entered the promised land. Moses warned the people that terrible things await the person who does not observe the commandments."(Deut.29: 9-30)

I know that in Exodus 20: 4 You said," You shall not make for yourself a graven image." "Lord, You have punished me enough! It is more than I can bear. Genug Shoyn! (Enough already)"

In that moment he heard his father's voice. "But God will take back, in great mercy, anyone who sincerely repents." (Deut. 28: 9-30)

It took time but at last Zalman found his Mother and his sisters in New York, America. They took him to the cemetery, to his father's grave.

Standing in the cemetery Zalman asked why there was no stone to mark his father's grave. His family explained that Rov Nachman ordered it so. He didn't want his name recalled until Zalman repented and returned to his people, Israel.

Everyday Zalman went to the cemetery. He begged his father to intercede with God on his behalf. He stood in shame and with regret pleading for an opportunity to restore his self-respect. He begged his father and God to forgive that foolish brazen youth who went to the University long ago in Russia. But it seemed that no one heard his pleas.

The men who worked in the cemetery grew accustomed to seeing Zalman there. They were friendly and welcomed his help attending to the graves.

One morning when Zalman arrived, he found the cemetery staff eeberkern (Upset) and tumuldik. (Excited) They had a problem and no solution. The unveiling of a stone was scheduled for the next day. The stone carver was sick. The stone had not been carved. What should they do? What could they do?

Zalman said, "Zorg zich nisht." (Don't worry) I will carve the stone for you. Show me the order sheet and lend me the stone carver's tools. I can do it."

The manager cleared his throat and said, "Antshuldik meir (Excuse me), but the stone carver must be an observant Jew."

Zalman replied, "I know. I am a Jew." When he saw that the manager was uncertain, Zalman said, "I can recite the Shema, or Kaddish, or if you prefer, I will quote any Biblical passage in Hebrew that you choose." What other proof would you want?"

After Zalman finished carving the stone and after the unveiling ceremony took place, the manager asked Zalman, "How much money do I owe you?" Zalman replied that he did not want any money. He just wanted a stone that he could carve and erect on his father's grave. With a smile and a handshake the manager agreed to Zalman's terms.

On his father's tombstone Zalman engraved the name Rov Nachman. Instead of carving a Torah Crown as one might expect, Zalman carved butterflies. The Butterfly wings would carry Rov Nachman's soul, and Zalman's prayers for forgiveness, directly to Heaven.

Zalman became a renowned engraver of tombstones. Many people asked for the butterfly design, but Zalman always refused those commissions. Only for his father did he engrave butterfly wings or as some folk said 'Angel Wings.'